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Keane L.'s Profile
ROTD!
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1. The View
San Francisco, CA 94103
(415) 896-1600
Categories:
Lounges,
American (New)
Neighbourhoods: Union Square, SOMA
If Emperor Palpatine had decided to cut Alderaan some slack and reposition the Death Star over San Francisco for some fancy cocktails and olives, he would get the view you see here. The initial reaction is surprise: the views from both ends of this…More »
2. Red Door Cafe
San Francisco, CA 94108
(415) 441-1564
Categories:
Breakfast & Brunch,
Cafes
Neighbourhood: Pacific Heights
Right as we enter, a man in short shorts pops around from behind the counter and warns us of a wait, and that if we should devote ourselves to this brunch experience, we ought not "run off to Yelp and bitch about it because I WILL FIND YOU."
Since I…More »
3. Little Vietnam Cafe
San Francisco, CA 94118
(415) 876-0283
Category:
Vietnamese
Neighbourhood: Inner Richmond
I wonder how prehistoric Britannians felt when metal was first introduced into their Stone Age culture by invading seafarers. Those visitors, appearing different and scary, possessed a greater knowledge of the world. The natives must've felt an…More »
4. Ichiban Kan
San Francisco, CA 94115
(415) 409-0472
Categories:
Cards & Stationery,
Ethnic Food,
Kitchen & Bath
Neighbourhoods: Japantown, Lower Pac Heights, Pacific Heights
There is no doubt that the best place to run to during the break of a zombie apocalypse is a sporting goods store. You'll find all the hockey sticks and Clif Bars you can carry there, as well as bikes and rifles if you're lucky. This is a fact…More »
5. Olea
San Francisco, CA 94109
(415) 202-8521
Categories:
American (New),
Breakfast & Brunch
Neighbourhood: Nob Hill
If Jesus was a chef and we were at his loft having brunch one day, I'd imagine his french toast would taste very similar to that served at Olea.
I'm not just saying this because he's Jewish and Olea's french toast is made with challah bread. I'm…More »
6. Zaré at Fly Trap
San Francisco, CA 94107
(415) 243-0580
Categories:
Mediterranean,
Persian/Iranian
Neighbourhood: SOMA
There's a giant National Geographic world map hanging on one of my closet doors. Every night when I brush my teeth, I look at it for a full two minutes (as required to let the fluoride in the toothpaste fully absorb), traveling visually through the…More »
7. El Farolito Taqueria
I'm spreading the gospel to all my friends.
Imagine, if you will, an El Farolito with ample seating. There is sunlight in this place and parking is plentiful. Friendly service and free chips await you. There are two restrooms instead of just one, and…More »
8. Red Devil Lounge
San Francisco, CA 94109
(415) 921-1695
Categories:
Music Venues,
Lounges
Neighbourhood: Nob Hill
Yo, VIP, let's kick it!
Vanilla Ice performed here and that is really all you need to know about Red Devil's radness. I've been here a couple of times and had fun, though the normal crowd that dominates the bar doesn't exactly constitute my preferred…More »
1 Previous Review: Show all »
-
5/5/2009
What I like most about Red Devil Lounge is that it never pretends to be anything it isn't. That's… Read more »
9. City College of San Francisco
San Francisco, CA 94103
(415) 267-6500
Category:
Colleges & Universities
Neighbourhood: SOMA
I'm not going to lie and say I didn't start studying Italian a year ago because of a woman. I mean, I didn't actually need the credits. I didn't really need to be buying textbooks as expensive as my iPhone, little notebooks from brands I haven't seen…More »
10. Mission Beach Café
San Francisco, CA 94103
(415) 861-0198
Categories:
American (New),
Breakfast & Brunch
Neighbourhood: Mission
I address thine holy writ in the Church of Bacon by declaring mine prior failures in executing the sacred rites, for I have come to confess...
Dearest Bacon,
I dare not sprinkle thee o'er every dish.
I doth not sizzle thou slices in the morn.
I doth not…More »
11. Pizzeria Delfina
San Francisco, CA 94115
(415) 440-1189
Breathlessly, I ran up the Lyon Street Steps and, in the process, discovered true poetry. I reached the top and was exhausted in such a way that all my thoughts came out in childlike observations...
Sky. Green grass. Puppy.
It's saying something…More »
12. Dosa On Fillmore
San Francisco, CA 94115
(415) 441-3672
Category:
Indian
Neighbourhoods: Japantown, Lower Pac Heights, Pacific Heights
Like any good American, I'm on an endless quest to silence my thinking. I'm plagued by profound thoughts. I hate it. My brain keeps asking questions with no quickly attributable answers.
"Why are we here?"
And while I could drink and smoke myself…More »
13. Buckshot Restaurant, Bar and Gameroom
San Francisco, CA 94118
(415) 831-8838
Life is surprising.
Sipping drinks in the upstairs lounge of Harlot while listening to Dido play an acoustic set for free could certainly constitute as a highlight of my previous night. Similarly, the spread of sushi and hot sake at the following…More »
14. Andreas Gorges Tailoring
San Francisco, CA 94108
(415) 391-1119
Category:
Sewing & Alterations
Neighbourhood: Union Square
I'm a man of the world. When it come to clothing, I like my threads European slim, made in America and at Chinese prices. I prefer the expert hands of Italian weavers to the work of underaged Thai children. I prefer the feel of Egyptian fibers to the…More »
15. Tropisueño
"I think there's a difference between just getting by and being content..."
she says.
"For me, it's how close it is to Friday ;-)"
I reply.
It's a subtle difference, and I don't think I thought about it until she said it... You can just get by with the…More »
16. Hotel De Anza
We had a little band in college that would get together and jam in an old, dirty garage. It wasn't much, but it was enough for three dumb kids still stuck on GnR and Metallica to express themselves. And when you're a little brat like I was back then,…More »
17. Bob's Donut & Pastry Shop
San Francisco, CA 94109
(415) 776-3141
ONLINE PETITION
Dear Bob's,
We, the undersigned, ask that you cease 24/7 operations and conduct business during normal daylight hours in such a manner that my drunken self can't score a bag of fresh donuts for an affordable price at 3 am in the…More »
18. Hemlock Tavern
Sometimes I lose my words... Sometimes I just don't feel like saying anything at all, as if a particular second had passed and I'd like nothing more than strive for the preservation of it - a simple moment fluttering as it is... pleasant.
I arrived…More »
19. La Mediterranee
San Francisco, CA 94115
(415) 921-2956
Categories:
Middle Eastern,
Mediterranean
Neighbourhood: Pacific Heights
In April, I met a girl who changed my life. I remember that first glance, the initial kick, followed by the uncontrollable flutter from catching her smile. Everything was routine then, while I found myself preoccupied with entertaining my mom, who…More »
20. Whole Foods Market
San Francisco, CA 94109
(415) 674-0500
Categories:
Grocery,
Health Markets
Neighbourhood: Pacific Heights
I'm obsessed with food. It's fantastic. When I tell people, the conversation usually goes like this:
Me: The best thing is that I live near Whole Foods.
You (yeah, you): That place is SO expensive!!
Me: Not really. They just sell better things.
You:…More »
21. Bittersweet Chocolate Cafe - CLOSED
San Francisco, CA 94115
(415) 346-8715
Categories:
Chocolatiers and Shops,
Coffee & Tea
Neighbourhood: Pacific Heights
I would very much like not to love, for what love does bring comes cost.
Bittersweet Cafe charges more per cup than other cafes. Almost a dollar more for some drinks before tax and tip. Its popularity brings in the masses on weekends, overwhelming…More »
1 Previous Review: Show all »
-
5/10/2007
Okay.
First of all...
This:
http://www.yelp.com/to...
was a joke.
Okay?
I categorized it under "humor… Read more »
22. Sophie's Crepes
San Francisco, CA 94115
(415) 929-7732
Memo: Sophie.
Re: Your crepes.
I'd like to inform you that your dessert crepes are too delicious for their own damn good. Once a shining champion of sharing, I have been reduced to prison-style hoarding. Observe my shifty eyes while I eat without a…More »
23. Angeline's Louisiana Kitchen
Berkeley, CA 94704
(510) 548-6900
Categories:
Cajun/Creole,
Southern,
Seafood
Neighbourhoods: UC Campus Area, Downtown Berkeley
Dear Angeline's,
You probably can't tell, but I've been feeling down, and wasn't exactly sure what to do about it. Booze? Oxycontin? Watch Rita Rudner? I can't stand anything that repulsively destructive. I need someone to lick my wounds and love me…More »
24. Victoria's Secret
Every guy wants to shop at Victoria's Secret with a girl. Common mistake.
Girl: Can you stand in line for me while I shop?
Me: Sure...
I grab a random item and stand in line, pretending I want to buy it.
In my right hand, a small Banana Republic bag. In…More »
25. Zara
San Francisco, CA 94108
(415) 399-6930
Categories:
Men's Clothing,
Women's Clothing,
Children's Clothing
Neighbourhood: Union Square
I've been lied to so many times I'm cold inside. Cold and dead.
Me: Do you have this in medium?
Z: Sorry, we're out, but we get new shipments twice a week.
Well, you know what? I went back and everything was EXACTLY THE SAME. No mediums. That speck of…More »
Recently updated lists from Keane L.
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Roma! (17)When in Rome, si mangia come i romani. |
Yelp Events! (97)Some people say Yelp is cultish but what do they know? The UFO isn't coming for them. |
Best Cafes in San Francisco (10)I am addicted to coffee. I love it. These are the places where I go to get my fix. |
My Favorite Drinky Places in San Francisco (12)These are my favorite bars/lounges/corners-to-s hoot-a-flask in the city. |
Hometown Hawaii (22)Favorite places in my hometown, including spots on the other islands. |
New Orleans! (6)Cray-zay in the Vieux Carre... |
First Trip to SF? Visit These Places! (20)Get a good representation of SF by hitting these spots during your first visit. |
My Favorite Food Places in San Francisco (9)These are a few of my favorite things. |
New York City! (21)A week in the Big Apple... |
See all 25 lists »
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12486 Useful, 18736 Funny, and 14854 Cool
San Francisco, CA
Yelping SinceFebruary 2006
Things I LoveLove, Festizio, Radiohead, Muse, Nero d'Avola, Sushi, Falafel, Italiano
Find Me Inconspicuous, with a monkey wielding telekinetic, pie-making abilities.
My HometownHonolulu, HI
My Blog Or Website When I'm Not Yelping...Monkeys aren't burdened by labor laws,
Why You Should Read My Reviewsand Costco sells bananas at $0.40/lb.
My Second Favourite Website The Last Great Book I Read(Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, Harry Potter, East of Eden)
My First ConcertFinally, telekinesis allows Mr. Squiggles
My Favourite Movie(Midnight in Paris, La meglio gioventù, Kingdom of Heaven, Motorcycle Diaries)
My Last Meal On Earth- his name is Mr. Squiggles -
Don't Tell Anyone Else But...to deliver said freshly-baked pie without laying his grubby mitts on it.
Most Recent DiscoveryBecause no one wants a monkey touching their pie before they eat it.
Current CrushThat's just common sense.