Fake Out

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I'm a fiendin' fool for the faux...meat, that is. Here's where you can nosh the mock stuff.

 1. Beijing of Greenbelt

131 Centerway
Greenbelt, MD 20770
(301) 345-3996

Category: Chinese

3.0 star rating
  1/6/2012

3.5 stars.

Mmmm, faux meat.  I love it.  Sure, some folks ignorantly paint *all* faux meats with the "ew, it's so processed" brush, but not all mock meats are created equal (I won't eat Morningstar products, but if a Chinese joint makes its own?…More »

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 2. Chen's Gourmet Chinese Carryout

5117 MacArthur Blvd NW
Washington, DC 20016
(202) 364-8313

Category: Chinese

Neighbourhood: Palisades

3.0 star rating
  11/12/2010

Coworkers and I order from Chen's with some regularity given that they will deliver to work.  We find the food pretty consistent and tasty.

I love love love fake mmmmeat, and Chen's offers a number of these dishes.  I feel like a good standard bearer…More »

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 3. Chin's Kitchen

6136 N Kings Hwy
Alexandria, VA 22303
(703) 765-4600

Category: Chinese

2.0 star rating
  10/1/2011

TVP General Tso's Chicken was good.  Nice flavor on the sauce, great texture to the faux meat.  But overbreaded.  And two spears of broccoli?  Come on, I actually *like* the stuff.

Shrimp Mooshu was also good.  Lots and lots of shrimp, al dente…More »

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 4. ChuChai

4088, Rue Saint-Denis
Montreal, QC H2W 2M5
Canada
(514) 843-4194

Categories: Vegetarian, Thai

3.0 star rating
  4/30/2010

Eight or nine years ago on a visit to Montreal, I discovered Chu Chai (then in its former location) by accident while wandering the neighborhoods.  I was so thrilled to find an all veg restaurant serving fabulous food I dragged my traveling companion…More »

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 5. Eatonville

2121 14th St NW
Washington, DC 20009
(202) 332-9672
2.0 star rating
  1/22/2011

The Eatonville Quiz

1. You arrive in the U Street neighborhood early for your reservation, but spend the next 20 minutes looking for parking. You:

a) are too busy playing Punch Buggy with your husband to be bothered.
b) assume the Lotus position and…More »

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 6. Grand Mart

6255 Little River Tpke
Alexandria, VA 22312
(703) 941-1177

Category: Grocery

4.0 star rating
  1/17/2011

How come we settle for such crappy food in our regular grocery stores?  Hunh?  Anyone?

Why are our apples and tomatoes tasteless and mealy?  Why do we eat carrots that have been chopped and run through a rock tumbler to smooth them out?

Most other…More »

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 7. Hard Times Cafe

4069 Chain Bridge Rd
Fairfax, VA 22030
(703) 267-9590
4.0 star rating
  12/15/2010

When husband invited me to be +1 at his office holiday party, I figured I owed him for all the Yelp events he's so cheerfully attended with me.  And when he told me the party would be at the Fairfax branch of Hard Times, I was in like Flynn.  

I…More »

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 8. Harmony Café

3287 M St NW
Washington, DC 20007
(202) 338-3881

Categories: Chinese, Vegetarian

Neighbourhood: Georgetown

4.0 star rating
  4/6/2010

I wish this was a Facebook status so "less than symbol 3" would turn into a wee heart when I hit enter and post this.  Because that wee heart aptly expresses my feelings about Harmony Cafe.  Love.  Pure love.

You might pass right by Harmony, at the…More »

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 9. Haute Dog and Fries

609 E Main St
Purcellville, VA 20132
(540) 338-2439
4.0 star rating
  3/23/2011

Lucky Purcellville.  Haute Dogs & Fries is a hella cool little spot I wish were closer to DC.  My dentist happens to be in this sleepy little Loudoun hamlet, so for the last 12 years I've found myself cruising the main P-ville drag at least twice…More »

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 10. Honey's Sit-N-Eat

800 N 4th St
Philadelphia, PA 19123
(215) 925-1150

Categories: Southern, American (Traditional)

Neighbourhood: Northern Liberties

4.0 star rating
  3/28/2011

Philly is *phull* of phabulous little phood phinds like Honey's Sit-n-Eat, tucked away in unassuming neighborhoods.  If not for Guy Fieri (yes, I *know* he's a tool, but the man sure eats well), I don't think Honey's would have made my list of Must…More »

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 11. Java Green

1020 19th St NW
Washington, DC 20036
(202) 775-8899

Categories: Vegetarian, Cafes

3.0 star rating
  5/14/2010

3.5 stars.

Believe it or not, soy bulgogi this close to Annandale is for those of us who don't eat *real* bulgogi.  We're everywhere.  Even this close to Annandale.

Java Green is good in my book.  All vegetarian, all organic, and eco-friendly…More »

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 12. Lucky Creation Vegetarian Restaurant

854 Washington St
San Francisco, CA 94108
(415) 989-0818

Categories: Vegetarian, Chinese, Vegan

Neighbourhood: Chinatown

4.0 star rating
  4/3/2010

4.5 stars.

As a vegetarian, I get really really super excited when I spy the words "vegetarian restaurant" on a sign or storefront.  A restaurant just for me?!?  How nice of you!

On our last trip to SF, husband and I were wandering the streets of…More »

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 13. Memphis Taproom

2331 E Cumberland St
Philadelphia, PA 19125
(215) 425-4460

Categories: Pubs, American (New)

Neighbourhood: Kensington

5.0 star rating
  3/30/2011

Stellar draught beer selection + fresh, flavorful, organic food + friendly neighborhood bar feel = utterly winning combo.  I'm in love.

When I say "stellar draught beer selection," I'm talkin' Lagunitas Hairy Eyeball, a delicious, heavily-malted sud;…More »

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 14. Mixto

1141 Pine St
Philadelphia, PA 19107
(215) 592-0363

Categories: Latin American, Cuban

Neighbourhood: Washington Square West

4.0 star rating
  3/31/2011

Well, it's true what they say: "Nothing propinks like propinquity."  (Don't pretend like you don't hear this aphorism on a daily basis.)

I first visited Mixto on a trip to Philadelphia a few years back with a dear girlfriend of mine, because it was…More »

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 15. North Sea Restaurant

2479 18th St NW
Washington, DC 20009
(202) 332-7628

Categories: Chinese, Sushi Bars, Asian Fusion

Neighbourhood: Adams Morgan

3.0 star rating
  11/2/2011

Meh.  

Delivery took an hour twenty.  That's a really long time to wait.

One entrée ran me $15 (including tip).  That's a lot of money for lunch.

They have the option of brown, fried, or white rice and getting your sauce on the side.  That's nice.

The…More »

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 16. Oriental Star Restaurant

3221 Duke St
Alexandria, VA 22314
(703) 370-4100

Category: Chinese

3.0 star rating
  7/13/2010

I'm feeling guilty.  I totally cheated on my tried-and-true Chinese delivery place tonight.  I'd been feeling trapped lately.  In a rut.  Like I've been missing out.  Fenced in.

I was enticed away from my go-to by Oriental Star's promise of fake meat…More »

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 17. O'Tasty

1764 Columbia Rd NW
Washington, DC 20009
(202) 234-0388

Categories: Chinese, Sushi Bars

Neighbourhood: Adams Morgan

2.0 star rating
  5/12/2011

O'Boy.  

Wanted to give O'Tasty a try, so I ordered delivery.  Went with "T.V.P Orange Beef," otherwise known as texturized veg protein in orange sauce.  I love fake meat.  I don't care if it's homemade at the restaurant or processed all evil-like at…More »

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 18. Puka Dog

2360 Kiahuna Plantation Dr
Koloa, HI 96756
(808) 742-6044

Categories: Fast Food, Hot Dogs

4.0 star rating
  4/1/2010

Vegetarian options at a hotdog stand?  SOLD!  So good we went twice during our week in Kauai.  

Love the concept: take a sweet Hawaiian hot dog roll, jam a hole in the middle with a hot metal rod, slip a hot dog (vegetarian) or sausage in there, top…More »

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 19. Red Emma's Bookstore Coffeehouse

800 St. Paul St
Baltimore, MD 21202
(410) 230-0450

Categories: Coffee & Tea, Bookstores

Neighbourhood: Mount Vernon

3.0 star rating
  2/28/2011

After several hours at the Walters Art Museum, husband and I were in desperate need of some refueling.  In the form of caffeine.  And happened upon Red Emma's as we made our way from Mount Vernon to Midtown.  I'm all in favor of locally-owned,…More »

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 20. Shanghai Chinese Restaurant

2400 Wisconsin Ave
Washington, DC 20007
(202) 338-3815

Category: Chinese

Neighbourhood: Glover Park

2.0 star rating
  9/15/2011

I dunno.  Apparently this place is supposed to specialize in Shanghai cuisine, but -- aside from the "Shanghai Steamed Pork Bun" -- the menu looked like every other Americanized Chinese joint in the world (not that I could even begin to tell the…More »

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 21. Sticky Rice

1224 H St NE
Washington, DC 20002
(202) 397-7655

Categories: Sushi Bars, Japanese

Neighbourhood: H Street Corridor/Atlas District/Near Northeast

3.0 star rating
  4/10/2011

Obligatory Shout-Out Review:

I purchased a LivingSocial coupon to Sticky Rice completely by accident.  I read the deal quickly, thought it was for Rice Bar, and one-click purchased (what? I want to create my own bibimbap).  Well, what's done is done.…More »

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 22. Sunflower Vegetarian Restaurant

6304 Leesburg Pike
Falls Church, VA 22044
(703) 237-3888

Categories: Vegetarian, Vegan

5.0 star rating
  1/5/2009

As a vegetarian, it's exciting to find a place specially dedicated to our diet, but that doesn't mean I'm "jaded."  Sunflower really is some of the best of the best.  Husband and I used to eat at the Vienna location when we lived there, and when we…More »

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 23. The Vegetable Garden

11618 Rockville Pike
Rockville, MD 20852
(301) 468-9301

Categories: Vegan, Vegetarian

2.0 star rating
  12/9/2010

2.5 stars.  After careful reflection, I amend my original three-star.  Since VG is so popular and award-winning, I figure my less-than-stellar rating won't hurt their business.

I really love vegetarian/fake meat restaurants like this, and we have some…More »

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 24. Yes! Organic Market

1825 Columbia Rd NW
Washington, DC 20009
(202) 462-2069

Categories: Grocery, Health Markets

Neighbourhood: Adams Morgan

4.0 star rating
  11/13/2011

The produce selection here doesn't bother me like it seems to bother a lot of other reviewers.  I pick up my fruits and veggies at farm markets and CSAs, so I don't usually come to organic/natural stores looking for fruit and vegetables anyway.  I…More »

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 25. Yuan Fu Vegetarian

798 Rockville Pike
Rockville, MD 20852
(301) 762-5938

Categories: Chinese, Vegetarian

3.0 star rating
  1/18/2011

3.5 stars.

Love the crispy shiitake appetizer.  Delicious sauce and a generous tangle of earthy 'shrooms.

Love the homemade noodles.  Fat and chewy and flavorful.

Love the commitment to cooking veggies.  They stay crunchy and colorful.

Love [most of] the…More »

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Recently updated lists from MacRae O.

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Despite their popularity, I find these places somewhat (if not totally) overrated.

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"These pretzels are making me thirsty."

Review votes:
9704 Useful, 6462 Funny, and 8166 Cool

Location

Alexandria, VA

Yelping Since

January 2009

Things I Love

stinky cheese, Belgian beer, boutique hotels, lurid gossip, ahi poke, dry humor, scotch, surprises, everything bagels, snow globes, Virginia wine, tuna salad, the ocean, Pickapeppa, Jelly Bellies, Texas, crushed ice, cold pizza

Find Me In

Monk's Café

My Hometown

Dallas, TX

When I'm Not Yelping...

I'm people watching.

Why You Should Read My Reviews

They've won Pulitzers.

My Second Favourite Website

http://www.foodgawker.com

The Last Great Book I Read

"At Home" by Bill Bryson

My First Concert

U2 Zoo TV

My Favourite Movie

Empire Records, Glory, The Sound of Music

My Last Meal On Earth

Stone crab, cole slaw, hush puppies, and ice cold beer beachside.

Don't Tell Anyone Else But...

I can't remember the last time I bought new socks.

Most Recent Discovery

Bacalao

Current Crush

Iceland